by Kiana Leigh Corpuz
Since I was 10, I already had a passion for writing. I loved collecting notebooks to record captivating moments that highlight my day. It was my best outlet to express all the spoken and unspoken thoughts and emotions that overflow within. Joy, surprises, disappointments, anger, and anxieties were penned down and kept inside my precious box. My family knew about it, and they kept on encouraging me to write, especially my late grandfather, who first believed in me, but the only problem was I didn’t believe in myself. I wanted to join the school publication when I was in grade school, but I got intimidated by the school writers bringing so much honor to the institution by winning competitive contests every once in a while. Eventually, I gave myself a chance when I was in high school, yet I was not convinced to pursue writing. Consumed by fear and doubts, this inner gift was set aside and was almost forgotten. Who would have thought that I am now writing again after several years of suppressing the passion?
Act I – Submission of Application
It was late in the evening, sometime in 2017, when I received a chat from a friend requesting me to like a photo of one of the Season II contestants of The Panoramic Soul. To my curiosity, I opened the link of the blog site and stalked the Facebook page. I got interested in its platform about traveling, which I am also passionate about. It is unique and truly inspiring, but there I was again, telling myself, “It’s not for me,” not because I don’t like to travel, but because I was afraid to fail. I was scared to try. I fear rejection.
In January 2018, I was plotting my goals for that year, and I just couldn’t understand why there was something within me that wanted to travel and to write again. Like, how could it be possibly done? I don’t have the resources to travel and go for adventures, and above all, how can I start writing? I know I’m called for something great, but I couldn’t figure it out as of that moment. So I kept it all in my heart, patiently waiting for an opportunity to come.
October came, and one of the most unexpected things happened in my life. It opened the gateway of my current journey. One of the finalists in Season II, who happened to be my officemate, invited me to submit an application to join The Panoramic Soul Travel Intern: Season III. I was astonished by his invitation that it took me a while to respond. I initially declined as I knew that there would be a bunch of experienced bloggers who deserve to gain a spot in the competition. He kept on encouraging me, but the more I said no, the more I got so restless, and that pushed me to give it a try. It was two days before the deadline then when I started to compose my entry. Without expectation, I submitted it after finalizing everything.
I didn’t bother to monitor the results as I avoid disappointment. So I drowned myself in work that day to divert my attention, but honestly, deep within, I was hoping to make it to the next level. To my great surprise, I got the news. I made it! I was in the 14th rank, and it felt like I already won in competition. A spark of confidence started to flame. I slowly began believing in myself. Casting out the negativity in me, I was ready for the next challenge.
Act II – A Test of Photography
I entered this contest with no idea in mind as to what set of challenges await me. I just knew it would be tough. When I received the message from the Editor-in-Chief for the next task, which is “A Test of Photography,” I panicked. I don’t have a good quality camera, like a DSLR, and my phone that time wasn’t working well. Photos being captured were corrupted, and I began feeling hopeless. I was too shy to borrow a camera from others, so I was forced to fix what I could possibly fix on my phone. To my relief, it was only partly repaired but enough to capture an image.
Going back to the challenge, there were three travel words as options, and I chose Uros-uros, which means Overflowing. I always believe that to travel is not just about capturing beautiful places and going somewhere for adventures. What makes traveling a worthwhile experience is when you get to immerse yourself in the place itself, experiencing captivating moments, breathing the sensation of positivity, and appreciating every single thing you see, as you fill your heart with gratitude because you are alive – one blessed soul to witness the beauty of creation.
When I saw those children, I saw something beyond the playground that made the whole place more wonderful. My submitted photo was captured near Luneta Park. After the photo was taken, I got the chance to talk to the children, and I listened to their personal stories. It made the experience more meaningful as I was filled with insights from what they just shared. I promised them that I’ll be back if I’ll win this competition, and I am really hoping to see them again. Before parting ways, they even wished me to win. It was absolutely fulfilling.
During the public voting, I got overwhelmed by the support of my family and friends in campaigning for the photo. It became my strength to continually put my heart in the journey of this season. Indeed, it was a “fear to love” experience. When I saw the number of likes of other contestants, I just wished then that whoever saw my entry will be blessed as I was blessed by the encounter.
Lo and behold, I could not have been more grateful when I saw my name in Top 2. The desire to write was enflamed even more.
Act III – EIC Challenge
I then moved to the middle part of the competition, which I believe was the most crucial and the most challenging – the EIC Challenge. Two tasks were given and should be submitted within 24 hours. This was provided right after the announcement of winners in the Act II – A Test of Photography challenge. I received the EIC’s message around 12 midnight, which means that the requirement would be submitted my output the same time the following day. This bothered me, and I suddenly opened my laptop to work on the tasks. A question was given for the first task, and I was asked to listen to a certain .mp3 file and share my adventure for the second task.
It was already 2 a.m. when I finished writing for the first task. Although I was a bit sleepy, I managed to download the attached .mp3 file and began listening. It was only musical, but it had a great effect to me during the entire duration. It was like I was dreaming and brought to different places for real. The emotions were so intense that I was awakened by the series of visions that flashed before me while listening. I felt an indescribable excitement and joy that time, and I hurriedly recorded what I vividly saw and experienced. There was an immense enthusiasm within that I didn’t notice that it was already 4 a.m. Nevertheless, I slept fulfilled after completing the tasks.
I was really surprised and very happy when the result was presented. I got the 1st place! I felt sorry for myself for not believing in me years ago. This made my conviction stronger that I could write. I realized that I should never underestimate whatever capability was given to me by the Most High as it will lead me to my core purpose of existence. From doubt to faith, I finally began believing in myself again.
My journey this season became tougher when it was time for the final interview
. I admit that I am not that confident enough to speak with others. I wanted to back out, but I no longer want to be consumed by fear. With courage, I faced the interviewers. Blessed enough, they were friendly, and I got comfortable along the way. I was surprised by the questions being asked. It was far from what I expected, but I tried my best to answer as sincerely and honestly as I could. I spoke with my heart.
Before the announcement of finalists, I was really nervous. I wasn’t that sure how they would rate me after the interview. I may have gained the first spot for the EIC challenge, but I was reluctant to find out the result of my interview. I kept reiterating to myself how the interview went and thinking how I should have answered. Then, I realized that what I was actually doing was stressful. I could not bring back time. It would be better to let go and learn from that challenge instead.
I was on a family date when the finalists were announced. I was in 2nd rank. Everyone was happy upon receiving the news, but I started to get scared again for the final challenge. I rebuked the negativity and turned my focus instead in seizing the moment – the privilege to be called as a finalist.
Final Judgment
It was January 4, 2019, when the time has come to finally reveal The Panoramic Soul: Travel Intern Season III winner. Combined emotions were felt. Every once in a while, my family would be messaging and calling me for updates. Everyone was thrilled. It was intense, and I couldn’t focus while staring at my PC to finish my work while everyone in the office was busy and excited for the weekend. There I was, caught in the moment of silence within, as I reminisce how my journey began in this competition. I could hardly imagine how I have come this far, especially with the thought that all the contenders are brilliant. Everyone deserves to be the Travel Intern Season III winner. We are all unique and special in our own ways, which I believe is the very reason why it was a tough deliberation for the judges.
Coming back to my senses, the fifth placer was announced. It wasn’t me. It was followed by the fourth and the third placers, who were still not me. I could already hear my heartbeat at that moment. It was a long pause before they announced the 2nd placer. I was having my dinner that time, but for the first time, I wasn’t enjoying my bacon, which usually delights me when stressed. My eyes were on my phone, waiting for the results. As soon as I finished the meal, the results were revealed. I saw the 2nd placer, and it wasn’t my name. The first placer wasn’t uploaded yet but I was already in victory state, filled with extreme joy and gratitude that I can no longer contain. I was teary-eyed. I wanted to embrace and congratulate everyone for a job well done.
Indeed! There is perfect timing for everything – a time to bloom and a time to shine. When your lifelong dream is still a vision, hold on to it; it will happen soon at an appointed season. Do not lose heart.
From the very depths of my heart, I extend my gratitude to my dearest family and friends and to everyone who supported and encouraged me along the way. To the one who invited me to join, thank you for the motivation, and I wouldn’t want to let this moment pass without acknowledging how grateful I am to The Panoramic Soul for believing in me and for paving the way to the fulfillment of this dream. You have sparked up the passion that once was quenched.
It is really an honor to be chosen as The Panoramic Soul: Travel Intern Season III winner. From despair to hope, I am looking forward to fantastic adventures ahead. I look forward to traveling with an enthusiastic heart, overflowing with joy and excitement to capture the extravagant beauty of Southeast Asia. Setting the passion for travel and writing on fire, I am now indeed ready to reach greater heights.
